What I found out today. o8o



I realise that after five years of not living in my motherland I grew more and more confused about the emotions that I get when I remember it. I get more and more in between of where I come from and where I actually am. Some kind of identity confusion if you may.

Today I found out that a law supporting homophobia has just been adopted. It actually scares me when I read the news more carefully. On the other hand, when I find things like that, it brings some kind of grey-ish funny nostalgic feeling to my stomach.

The more I think the more I realise that it's all about accepting. Accepting who you are and what you want to be. Where you come from is always going to be that place/space or idea. It's always going to be a part of you. It's where you decide to peregrinate from this very moment on. And, yes, we all want to belong. To feel like we matter. To belong to an expensive golf club, knitting club, church, ideology, party, family, lover, book club, etc. yet what would you answer if I asked if you actually belong to yourself?!...



All time is all time. It does not change. It does not lend itself to warnings or explanations. It simply is. Take it moment by moment, and you will find that we are all, as I've said before, bugs in amber.
~Kurt Vonnegut, Slauterhouse V

Comments

ievute said…
o zinai, as visai neseniai apie panasius dalykus galvojau ir I do actually belong to myself. Gyvenu taip, kad man paciai miela gyventi butu ir zmoniu niurzgejima bei nepasitikejima tuo, ka darau ir kuo gyvenu priimu kaip nepasitenkinima tuo, kad nevisi sugeba sau priklausyti ir eiti gyvenimo takais, kuriais noretu nes neuztenka arba drasos, arba ryzto arba yra per daug prate kad viskas butu padaroma uz juos...

is tikruju. geras klausimas -
you actually belong to yourself?!...
17 July 2009 at 05:12
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